This weekend is opening pheasant season in my home town. It might not mean anything to anyone else in the country, but there? There its like a national holiday. Before we moved, this was always an annual event: the boys hunting, the girls making yummy things in the kitchen, drinking way too much coffee and going to the Arts Fair.
I remember last year on this weekend, spending it alone with Sophie while the boys were camping. All my family was gathered back home and it made me feel so lonely. Not a lot has changed this year…at least I wasn’t alone this weekend. But still it evokes all these memories that I miss. Like:
my mom’s coffee cup in the microwave because she forgets it in there 14 times a day
chili and rice at the end of the day
catching up with old friends in town for the festivities
brisk Fall weather
all the guys in their orange
how everyone in my family is all talking at the same time and nobody’s really listening
the kids playing with all my old toys
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We’ll be going back in a little over a week. It will be fun…there will be some of these things ^^^ But its different. It weird living away now because when we go back it feels so much the same, but yet this big wedge of different that I know can’t ever be the same. I talked to my cousin that lives far away and she said it like this: I feel sad when I’m away, but when I’m here I feel glad I made the decision to move. I feel like that too. I know it will never be the same, but being so far is really hard. Now with four kids, not having my mom nearby is a difficult thing. Plus I feel like no one knows Vera…this all weighs on me. Where is the happy medium distance?
Thankful for today:
1. impromptu pumpkin carving parties on the lawn in our neighborhood
2. the sun in my windows
3. emails that bless
4. an $8 fur coat at Goodwill…just cause
5. Sophie’s old clothes that fit Vera now
6. that baby, saving my over emotional Mom-hormones as Sophie loses her THIRD tooth
7. Noah working hard on Scout project
8. supplies bought for costume making today
9. another Eleanor quote in my “Daily Quote” today
10. quiet mornings
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