DEFINING A SIMPLE FRIENDSHIP
Common interests are obviously pretty important. It’s also great if you have a few different like because you can learn a ton from each other. But if you have no common interests what will you talk about? What will you do together? It’s easy to find these people through your kids activities or other regular hangouts. But you definitely need more than common interests to have a close friendship.
Are your friends needy? This is maybe just me, or maybe because I homeschool and even though I am at home, I am really busy at home, so that means coffee dates and a lot of daytime activities aren’t really happening. Do you have friends that get upset if you don’t call them right back? Or maybe they want to “compete” with your other friends in a way. Maybe you just simply feel drained after spending time with them. That would be a needy friend. I’m not talking about a friend going through a hard time and them wanting to talk through it, not that at all. We should be there for our friends through hard times. I’m talking about a friend that never runs out of problems, when you’re left feeling like you just went through a tornado after a coffee date.
My friends have to be real, genuine. This is the most important thing for me. Life is short, life is busy. There are a million things everyday to attend to. We (or maybe just me?) don’t have a lot of time for small talk. For me, I do not have room for surface friendships. I want the real deal. I want to be able to give it to you straight. I want to be able to tell you my heart and trust you with it. I want to laugh till our side ache together. I want to be able to cry with you and have you just get it. Yes, we have friends that are deep friendships and those that are not as deep and that is totally normal. We need all kinds of friends. But those few that we hold dearest are the ones we commit most to. If there are friends calling every day that you’ve known for a long time, but they can never get real with you, you may need to move on from that friendship. I need real.
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