Regular dates nights are most definitely important. It’s a chance for you and your spouse to connect without kids to distract you. Date nights are definitely something you should not say no to, but they are also something that doesn’t need to be made complicated. I think somewhere along the line we decided “date night” could only include a babysitter, a reservation, a hundred dollars, and a regular spot on the calendar every other Friday night. For parents, this can be a lot of pressure. But we can keep this simple too. We see people on Instagram or Facebook all dressed up announcing their nights out and we feel guilty. Today we can erase “date nights” from the list of things to stress over not doing well enough. We can stop worrying about date nights.
Date nights should maybe be written on the calendar, but just to keep you serious about it, not to hold a night out of the house. Try something a little less complicated next time:
Pick out a good movie you’ve been waiting to see
Feed the kids early, put them to bed early, and cook your own dinner together
Get up early on a Saturday and have scones and coffee
Play a game together–we love Cribbage and Rummikub!
Choose a TV show you both like and have a TV marathon on a Saturday night
Plan together: find a time when the kids are in bed, morning or night, serve a yummy dessert or a treat, and make your Christmas gift list together, make a list of concerts you want to see, list all the vacations you’d like to take your family on, make a list of movies you want to see
It doesn’t have to be a bit ol’ deal, as long as you’re taking time for each other without kids around. They are the sweetest things, but they sure do make it hard to focus on each other sometimes. Scratch dating off your list of things to stress over and start planning your next low-key night together.
This post is part of a 31-day series on simplifying our homes and schools.
To read from the beginning of this series, click here:
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Even though we live only 10 minutes from each set of grandparents, regular childcare is not something we have. We have spent most of our date nights at home, after the kids are asleep (just like you mentioned), and I've grown to love & appreciate them just as much as a night out.
My husband I look forward to every Friday night after the kids go to bed when we have "Special" Drinks and Popcorn and watch a movie. The special is spicy popcorn and alcohol and in the drinks. 🙂
That's so good. I do miss living closer to our family for that reason for sure!!
We are fortunate enough to have all of our grandparents living close by, so having those date nights come fairly easily for us! We DO spend most of them at home even if the boys are gone, sitting on the back porch with a frosty drink if it's warm, and a warm drink (and fire) if it's frosty.
After over 20 years (16.5 married) he really is still my fave person in the world. 🙂