old friend, new friend
Our recent trip to South Dakota, was a whirlwind of coffees and lunches with friends. I left some really good friends in Aberdeen. When you move, you think you’ll never find friends like your old friends…or at the very least, if you do find them, it will take years. It takes a lot of time to get close to someone…to invest in someone. You have to find that common ground. You have to put yourself out there.
Gina and I have been running buddies for a long time…years even. As soon as I moved she found out she was having her second baby. We had about a 3 hour coffee one morning about a week before that little guy made his appearance. We laughed and cried together. I love this girl so much. She is so like me and so different from me at the same time. She’s a diva…I am not. And I love that about Gina. I miss her.
I had a coffee with a college girl friend…as in, she’s in college and I’m way NOT in college so she makes me feel young. Love that about Jessica. She’s a sweet girl. She holds her own. She’s strong with a big ol’ heart. I’m so glad we got to catch up.
Christiana is my friend, Robin’s, daughter. She is just about the sweetest thing that ever lived. She used to babysit for my kids sometimes and she was always around for Robin and my endless projects. Right after I went back home to NC, Christiana took a giant leap of faith and headed to school in Arkansas. I’m so proud of her for taking a chance like that.
I also got to spend a lot of time with Elise, Robin’s oldest daughter. She is so fun! We decorated for a friend’s wedding together and she just makes everything more fun. Miss you, Elise!!
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Robin….oh, Robin and I go way back. We met at the Aberdeen airport of all places. She was picking up family and so was I. We found out we were in the same bible study and the rest is history. We’ve seen each other through moves, babies, heartbreak, heartache, life eruptions, and approximately 57 Beth Moore studies. We’ve mentored each other and held each other up. She’s like an older sister I never had. I love her.
Nick and Lindsey are some of our besties. We’ve got a lot of history. Nick just got back from Iraq for the second time…which made me cry to see him in real life. We bid him goodbye last June, have been communicating through letters and facebook for a year, and to finally see him for reals was so good. Especially since we threw a wrench in things by moving while he was gone…sorry, Nick. Jarrod was his Best Man and they are disc golf partners for life. He was lucky enough to find the best girl ever a couple years ago. We kept telling him if he messed this up, we’d have to kick his butt…he listened. Good choice 😉
There were lots of others I would have loved to see, but there just wasn’t enough time. The kids wanted to see more of their friends too, but with a birthday party, a wedding, and a camping trip there wasn’t a lot of time…next time.
When you move away, you realize all the people you had in your life because all the sudden you don’t have any. I do have great blogging friends that I love dearly. They are awesome because they all live far away anyway and your friendship relies greatly on the phone. I love my blog friends.
Making friends was not high on my expectation list when I moved here to Asheville. I just kinda didn’t think I would have many for a while…and while I wouldn’t say I have developed this great big network of friends, I have met some pretty fabulous people. Between living in a commune-type thingy, a huge friendly homeschool group, and a fabulous church I have met a lot of wonderful people I can call friends.
I can say, though, that I have met one bestie that will be a friend for probably ever if I have anything to say about it. Carissa appeared on my doorstep the day after we moved here. The day after we thought we may have possibly made a giant mistake and/or forgot our pitchforks and bib overalls in order to fit in. We have since learned that not all the people here are pitchforky…just some 😉 And have since gotten used to mountain folk. But that initial day, we were having some culture shock.
Carissa showed up that day with pumpkin cookies and we’ve been friends ever since. She saved me some of those first days with Jarrod working in Charlotte all week and me, not knowing a single thing about anything. Our kids are besties and our husbands hang out too. They are such a blessing…and an unexpected one too.
Saturday, Carissa treated me to pedis at a spa downtown and lunch at one of my favorite places in Asheville for an early birthday celebration. We shopped and laughed and had heart-to-hearts. After less than a year, I can’t really believe I have that here.
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So on my 30th birthday week, I can’t help feeling my heart bursting a little bit. I look at these relationships and thank Jesus He’s blessed me so much. Through moving and blogging I have friends all over the US…that is amazing to me. Even though I won’t technically be with all these great women when I turn 30, I can look back at 30 years and see the people that have made a difference to me…and that makes getting older worth it to me.
The gray hairs I see poking up? No…that sucks. These great relationships? Yes, now that’s worth the laugh lines.
I just found your blog through heather @lifemadelovely.
Kinda been reading and stalking you all day. But the really big is that i love that your in Asheville. I'm in Greenville which is not far at all. Just wanted to introduce myself..so glad to have found you. 🙂
Ack! Missed one!!
Girl you are so young… and the things you said about relationships…AMEN. Couldn't agree more… they are the most precious thing.
Enjoy your birthday. Hope you have lots of special surprises and lots of cake!!
I've got the Girl scout song running through my head now…."Make new friends but keep the old, one is silver and the other gold." 🙂
I can't believe you're turning 30…am I really 9 years older than you? You'll LOVE your 30s!!!
Love this post. I totally hear you and understand how you feel too. Having moved so I've now lived in 3 countries in the span of 2 years, friendships have come and gone. I do have to say that because I know I am going back 'home' when we are done with our stint overseas it is making it hard for me to embrace making new friends in Scotland. I don't want to put the effort in for a friendship that will only be 1 year long. Sigh. But, it has also helped me see that God puts people into your lives for a reason, and for whatever span of time He thinks you need them, right? 🙂
so glad you were able to hang out with friends! oh, it makes a heart feel so good when you can connect and re-connect with some girlfriends. and while blog friends are super cool, real life friends are just as necessary.
hope you had a wonderful birthday week 🙂 xoxo
Dear difficult friend (hehe)- What I love most about our story is that God chose for 2 SD girls to meet in Asheville. Just because I moved here 4 months before you, you often mistaken me for saving you when I actually believe it to be the other way around. You were my guinea pig, another new girl in town with no friends, someone who came from "home." I am blessed to call you a friend, but maybe even more blessed by our family friendship. We were all what everybody needed last year. I love you, your hubby, Noah, Jack, and Sophia….I don't have many other friends I can say that about. So, as our lives begin to add new chapters I cannot wait to see how they unfold and am confident enough in us to say that it doesn't really matter because we will always be friends. Happy Birth Week!
You get what you give, I so sure that Carissa feels the same way about you Missy, have a great birthday week!
Happy birthday week! I know what you mean about moving and having people brought into your life!
i'm tellin' ya what…that carissa is like an angel. i would have KILLED for her to be here when we moved in. God knew just what you needed girlfriend. He handpicked her just to meet that need in that season! He's so amazing like that!!! Love you:)
My philosophy has always been … one can never have too many friends. And so happy for your old and new ones.
Happy Birthday. You turn 30 this year, I turn 60. That is kind cool.
happy 30th birthday week!!! you look amazing, girl. and i know… you still have two days left in your 20's…but still… 30 will never look so GOOD!
also, Sage's middle name is Christiana. LOVE that name!
Hooooooooooray for birthday week!!! It's gonna be an amazing year!!!! Love you friend! I am SO INCREDIBLY BLESSED to call you my friend. Love you to pieces!
I totally relate to this! We moved away from home 7 years ago. Within the first few months I saw a chicken walking down the sidewalk and I burst into tears. I wanted to abort the whole plan right then and there and go back to my big city of a million people… Glad you have made some friends in your new home!
I can't tell you enough how great it was to see you! It's so crazy to me that it's been almost a year since you guys moved. Thanks for mentioning me… I teared up a little 🙂 Miss you, Alicia!
I miss you too, Alicia!! Glad you let me in on your recent splurge for sweet Sophi (remember: tell her to watch the mail 🙂 Love you! Proud of you for taking your own leap of faith in moving!
you AlWAYS remind me of the verse,
"a man that hath friends must show himself friendly."
this doesn't come easy for me(branching out to make friends), but knowing you long distance for this short time has taught me that.
see? your teaching me by example.
and i love that.
you are a great friend.
love ya girl and i will totally be thinking about you all week.
hope it's absolutely fantastic(like you)! 😉
So great to see old friends! Loved your post. I agree with being older it takes a long time to make friends like you used to.
Such a great post. New Friends and Old Ones, all are the best. Happy Birthday!!!. Hugs, Marty
Happy Birthday 🙂
You have great friends. But I bet you don't have gray hairs.
I can totally relate on so much of this post! I have experienced it all as well! I hope you have a wonderful Birthday week!