March 10, 2012


I think we can all agree that most times, we are our own worst critics. I know I am.

To level with you truly, I still don't feel like I've fully recouped since moving five months ago.
It goes it spurts, like I'll be feeling really's going well, I'm working out semi-consistently, yada-yada. Then I'll have something like a leaky pipe leading to workers and gaping holes in the ceiling or we will have a guest or we'll move again  (ha! let's not do that again for a while.) I don't mean that to sound mean (about the guests that is) I love having my people around me. It's just like we're on vacation too then and it doesn't take much to get me off kilter these days.

Now that we are settled and our home feels much more like home, I had big plan for this week. We're getting ready for another round of guests next week and I have a list of things to do. Needless to say, nothing got done this week. A whole week with not a lot to show for it.

I was having a conversation about my conundrum with a friend yesterday morning and after we hung up I decided I needed to self-prescribe myself some things...several things.

I keep thinking to myself, "after Sophie was born, life was crazy for a couple weeks and then I was good to go...back to routine like normal." I keep waiting for "normal" and it still doesn't feel quite there yet. I'm not patient. I want to know every corner of this town, every shop, every cool hang-out and I want every day to go exactly according to schedule. Doesn't that all sound nice?

Ok but here's the real situation...I came to the realization yesterday that this moving business might very well take a whole year or more to get used to. I want everything now. I don't like waiting. (do I sound bratty?)

But I'm gonna have to wait.

And while I wait I'm going to do my self-prescribed list: give myself some grace, read, tea, nap, get through this school year and do simple school with the kids instead of my preferred project-filled school.
I'm going to eat more donuts.

(ok, so I fit into a pair of jeans that hasn't fit me in a year at least-which is completely miraculous because of my lack of exercise-and I did a victory dance...with Mr. Dunkin.)

Also to add to my Rx form...more baths.

(quiet baths...with no children and The Hunger Games)

Do you need a prescription? Write it up, sistah.


Robin said...

My prescription is to go have a cup of tea with my friend Alicia. But then, I would have to become a visiting guest to your house again which would undo your presciption list and cause you to have to start this process all over. That would not make me a nice friend since you need to follow the prescribed behaviors your self diagnosis has given you.

On a side note: I love you. You are my friend. And I think you are awesome. It really is all good. Like you told me, embrace this time. That's our new word, EMBRACE.

klaz said...

Alicia, I can so relate to you on so many levels! We too moved across country 6 months ago and I want a "normal" feeling I haven't achieved yet. There are still rooms to be organized and decorated, remodeling to be done, walls to be painted.....I have 3 kids (8,6 and2) and it seems I can never quite get finished or started for that matter what my heart desires. Then there is that whole matter of developing new friends and that takes time!! During this transition time I have found such comfort in a morning cup of joe and reading my favorite blogs, you are one of them! You will never know the comfort I had last week when my kids came home with head lice and I randomly sat down to read one of your archive posts and read your kids had it too! Anywhoo, I'm off on a tangent...just wanted to say hang in there and love your blog!

janet @ ordinary mom said...

I completely agree with you. We moved a year and a half ago and only 15 minutes from our old house but this house is completely finished so there isn't a lot of storage space to hide things like before. I feel like I am STILL trying to get settled and make this place home. This weekend I have decided to turn my focus to organizing and decluttering. Which is hard with kids (mine are 5&7) and a constant issue (esp. with clothes they grow out of SO fast).

And then there is self image and self care. Before we moved I was running every day and in such great shape. And now I am struggling to find that person again.

One day at a time is all we can focus on I guess. Somedays it is one hour at a time.


Handbags*N*Pigtails said...

One day at a time...I have that phrase written on a dry erase frame in my classroom. Sometimes thats how simply I need to break things down.
Love this post.

Sabrina said...

I love your prescription! You know, moving is one of the most stressful things in life. It's actually on the traumatic list of life events. I have been living in my current home for about a year now and I'm still not over the move. It was tough on me. I left a house I loved and had to make do in a house that was just okay. Now we are thinking about moving again and it just makes me want to hide! It's okay to still feel unsettled. Just follow your prescription and take one moment at a time. :)

Blissful Blooms said...

Oh my sweet friend. I love your little Rx- it's perfect. The only thing I might add is a few more doughnut runs. I truly hope you're able to give yourself a little wiggle room and a whole lot of GRACE. I feel like hugging you right now . . . SQUEEEEEEEEZE! Did you feel it?
LOVED those pictures of you! You are adorbs! (stole your word) I'll be checking in on Monday to make sure you took all your prescribed goodies!

Smallgood said...

My prescription is to go to the flea market, to have a vicious assault with my camera, and to watch a Jane Austen inspired film. I needed it badly with how wild work has gotten.

P.S. I didn't love love love the Hunger Games book. I was a bit harsh with my criticism of how annoyingly agonizing certain parts were, but that being said, I CANNOT wait (!!!) for the movie.

Valerie Ross said...

You're too cute Alicia. Thank you for the donut bit. I love when mamas show their "I don't give a damn" side. That's the real part of being a mom that so many of us try to hide but if I didn't have those days where I ran to McDonalds for a caramel frappe I would be a grumpy mama.

Evie said...

This post really resonates with me as I'm feeling overwhelmed at the moment. I'm studying and being a wife and mother and daughter (in-law) and aunt and friend and, and, and.
Having been floored this week by a chest infection that feels very much like a health shot across my bows, I think I need to take a leaf out of your prescription pad and cut myself some slack.
Thanks for sharing. Sometimes the need to be the perfect mother/wife/whatever blinkers me from what's really important in life. And perfection isn't it!

thetwistedruffle said...

i bought the hunger games yesterday. how funny...well, we can read it together!

hang in there!

Biz said...

I gave myself a Rx shortly after Bitsy was born.
It involved not being so hard on myself when it came to the house.
I'm a bit of a neat freak.
But I realized quickly that I wasn't going to have the energy to do it all anymore.
In the new year I gave myself a Rx to read more...and I've done that and it's wonderful!
I read all 3 Hunger Games books in 3 weeks (that's fast for this mama, Bitsy doesn't want me to read when she's awake haha)!
Enjoy the books and foam baths and just smile because it's all gonna be okay!


Jessie May said...

I so get what you're saying. I've been trying my whole adult life to get organised and I'm now telling myself it ain't gonna happen, just enjoy the now or things are going to pass you by. And I get so impatient, I want things to happen now, but that's not realistic either. So, I'm going with the flow and trying not to beat myself up. Enjoy your book and cups of tea and thank you for being so honest about life, you are a true inspiration!! Oh and when I'm in a rut with my home and not knowing what to do with it, I take a look at the photos of your home and how you repurpose things and it inspires me, so thank you, big time. Enjoy your weekend : )

Marissa said...

Thanks for making me stop and take a deep breath! That's what I need... deep breaths and to just clear my mind. I am working to live in the present and stop thinking about what's coming around the corner.
So glad you're enjoying the Hunger Games!


This is so good, Alicia. You have been through a lot of change. And your RX is perfect.

I think it takes a year and it is taking me longer here ... since living IN the city is different.

I think you are right on target ... Mr. Dunkin and all.


carissa at lowercase letters said...

grace, and grace and grace. spending time with Jesus. and chocolate. that's mine. : )

Mandy said...

glad you are finally reading them!

i've been in a funk too. been debating on sharing my lows on my blog or not. and i'm not even sure why i have them, but yuck! maybe i'll take your perscription dr.alicia

Jennifer S. said...

MMMMM...donuts! Yes! I think thats a great list. I can't imagine what it has been like for you. I am on the opposite end where I wish we could move(Not across the country) but we can't. I feel trapped in this tiny house. :) I guess it will just take time. Funny how that seems to be the only thing that ever works anyway, at least for me. Too bad time moves so slow sometimes! I don't even know if that makes any sense! Ha! Hugs to ya!

Theresa said...

I love the photos!! I think we all feel like that sometimes and we all need to just do what makes us happy for a while. I love your Rx idea!!! Grace for myself--there is a new concept!

Mary said...

i totally agree that we are our worst critics.
lately, i have had to have some serious talks with the Lord about this.
as in...HE is holding my hand every minute, telling me it's ok, keep walking, keep trusting, keep depending...on Him. :)
i'm still taking baby steps, and it's OKAY! it actually feels really good.
bless your heart for sharing such realness.
i will keep on praying for you and you BETTER make sure that list gets DONE, girlfriend!
and i want to see things crossed off...because i know that makes you feel good!


and YAY! to fitting into your jeans! :) i am currently outgrowing mine! errggg!

bird and tree said...

oh took how I have been feeling for the last year and spelled it out! How encouraging! I am so glad to have read this...and I am so glad you did this for yourself! As for me... Less doubt-more DO...less excuses, more positivity more adventures...that sounds dreamy :) I love this post!!!

Sarah said...

The thing I have to say over and over to myself is... "Self, done is better than perfect." We perfectionists need to hear that every once in a while and be OK with it.

I've also been trying to remember to put the most important things in to my day first (the BIG rocks) then let the other fun, silly, less pressing things (the LITTLE rocks) in last. Then everything fits!

I love you, My Friend!

Barbara said...

Glad the donut diet worked for you it didn't for me! My Rx is to get outside thanks to the time change it's doable.

Farmgirl Paints said...

prescription for beating the blah's and getting through the valleys...just keep going. don't think too much, because it will all change before you know it. pray alot! and call your friends;) keep busy just trekking along and before you know it you'll be so happy you won't know what to do with yourself:)

count it all joy said...

Hi Alicia, I've recently discovered your blog through Melissa @ Miss Sew & So (isn't she a delight!). On the premise that any friend of Melissa's etc etc..... I started visiting. This post is awesome. A case of the blah's is the pits. Having said that, you seem to have made incredible progress in the nesting department:). Your home looks so warm & inviting, no small feat given the packed timetable you've been on.

I hope you soon find your favourite barista, hairdresser, doctor, park, bookshop...and then tell us all about it:). Hey, congrats on the combo of fitting into your skinny jeans & eating a choc doughnut....that's a 8.9 degree of difficulty right there. Clever clogs. Meredy xo

Lemonade Makin' Mama said...

Okay girl I have been trying to comment for TWO days on this... for some reason blogger either tweaks out or my children do and the comment never gets published. But I'm here now. LOL

I know you are in the thick of it... moving/unpacking/not moving/adjusting/getting settled takes it out of a girl... then throw in kids and homeschooling and LIFE and you've got a recipe for trouble. (I was going to say you've got a recipe for becoming a drinker... but I thought better of it. Then again, perhaps a shot of coconut rum would cure some of the things that ail ya. I did NOT just say that. Shhhh.)

Okay well here's the other thing- blogging is therapy so you just let it all out and we'll LOVE ON YOU.

I"m so glad you're reading the Hunger games.

I'm also realizing why it's taken me two days to get this comment down. Apparently it's because I'm writing you a book. Ha.

Love you sweet pea. Hang IN THERE!

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